We Shall Call Him Creepy!

My mom talks about the iron will that I have always had. She said that it first manifest itself during childhood when I would literally have to see the "white of my mom's eyes" before I would comply with their wished. Even then it was not guaranteed that I would comply in the manner and method that they had hoped. I was stubborn, defiant and strong willed. I wanted my way and did not want to be bothered by the wants of the lowly peasants known as my parents it would seem. My mom recalls an instance where I did not want the rest of a piece of cheese that I was eating and so I threw it on the floor at my mamaws house (that would be my grandmother for those of you who not speak my familial language). I was then told to pick it up and throw it away but to my parents amazement I said "NO". I refused and come hell or high water I was not going to retrieve that which I had already discarded. Obviously this necessitated some sort of punishment and as was my parents and grandparents way I was to receive a "whoopin". Now to most kids of 4 or 5 this might seem like a huge deterant but for me it only steeled my will even more. After several separate "whoopins" and far too much time spent on such a small piece of discarded food, my mamaw and parents gave up and threw away the cheese themselves. "I WIN!!!"

Now let me fast forward to the present. I have two boys whom I love dearly. They offer my life the joy of unpredictability--however my wife did that well enough on her own without us adding two others to the mix. My son Joshua is a pistol. He is full of energy and lot of fun. He loves to spend time with his daddy too which I love very much. However I believe that I am realizing now something I had on capacity to realize when I was 5 and won the battle of wills with my parents--I have passed that trait on to my boy. Joshua can be stubborn, defiant and stiff-necked just like I was (and probably still am). Just the other night my wife was finishing the tucking in process after I had already sang songs and prayed with him. She will stay behind and sing one more song with him and then kiss him goodnight and leave the room. Lately he has been calling out to us using every excuse in the book to get us to come back into the room. Typically he finds something that lures us back in usually having something to do with urinary wetness. On this particular night Brenda finished her ritual and was telling Joshua that she was not going to be coming back into the room and that he just needed to go to sleep and we would see him in the morning. She noticed that he was whispering something and so she listened little more closely. Each time that she was reiterate that she was not coming back in to his room, Joshua would whisper, "Yes you are" . Alittle creeped out by this she asked him what he was saying to her to see his reaction but he simply shook his head no signaling he had not said anything. The fashion with which he had said this creeped Brenda out a bit because it sounded eerily like the "I see dead people line from The Sixth Sense. Brenda left the room completely freaked out and told me what he had said and I laughed because I knew that he was simply showing his defiance. He knew that he would win. Sure enough at some point that night he lured us back into his room and his prediction came true.

I am amazed at defiance. Irregardless of the intended good that we have for him he simply wants to assert his will and win. How often do we take this same tone with God. God sees the good possibilities that can be the outcomes of periods in our lives if only we will listen to His leading. Unfortunately we often choose our own way and will and thwart the good that God desired. This creates a situation that we ask God to redeem due to our own poor choices and in His grace and mercy He often does. Perhaps I am simply reaping what I sowed at an early age or perhaps I am simply experiencing Joshua's terrible two's. All-in-all I am blessed to be his daddy. And because of this I now have a great new nick name for him--"Creepy". God bless.